lost and found
I apologize if this sounds like I am complaining or being ungrateful in any way, shape, or form, but somehow this week felt like a week of losing things: time spent waiting around, time spent dillydallying, money spent on stuff I probably didn't need; sleep, youth, emotions, connections, a bit of hope. But at dinner on Thursday night with two very good friends, this smiled back up at me, and I thought maybe this week could also be a week of finding things: time spent on worthwhile causes, effort spent towards something larger than life, courage and strength, emotions, connections, a bit of hope, happiness. Maybe this isn't particularly insightful or groundbreaking, but maybe you just find the happiness wherever you can—even in a plate of freshly steamed mushroom-vegetable buns that may or may not remind you of some starlet's perky breasts (don't pretend you don't see it), in the middle of a Chinese restaurant in the middle of a mall in the middle of the business district in the middle of the city. And maybe it's okay if you have to be the one to find that happiness, if it doesn't come and find you the way you feel it's supposed to, if it doesn't come easy. Maybe what matters is that you never stop looking.